“How are you so good at learning languages? See, I’m just not that way…”

STOP. Stop right there.

If I can count the number of times I have heard this sentence, I would fall asleep before I finish counting.

This thought process is just as dangerous as it is untrue.

Many people mistakenly think that they are either born with linguistic talent or not. Rather than viewing it like a skill to develop, most view it like a natural ability or inclination. If you are one of those people, it’s my goal to change your mind in the next 5 minutes.

If there is just one thing you take away from this post, take away this: People who are “amazing at learning languages” are people who are amazing at failing fast and learning from their mistakes.

Let me start with a quick story:

My cousin, Nass, recently married a lovely lady named Andrea. Andrea is one of those people who is “amazing at languages.” She speaks Spanish, French, Italian, and English fluently. From her countless stories on her language learning adventures, you want to know which story stuck with me the most?

Her 2nd year of learning Italian, she was speaking to a middle-aged Italian woman about this Sicilian town she had recently visited. This town was known for its houses with red roofs. Mistakenly replacing the word “teti – roofs” with “tete – boobs,” she went on to tell this poor woman that there were big red boobs in the city. Red boobs there, and over there, and even there… Just imagine the look on this Italian woman’s face, or better yet, the look on Andrea’s face when she learned what she had said. In fact, you know what Andrea did when she learned her mistake? She started cracking up in laughter. She thought it was the funniest thing in the world. Well, because, I mean… it is!

And this story is just the tip of the iceberg. Making mistake after mistake, early and often in the language learning process, is precisely how Andrea became fluent in 4 languages.

She did not need magical language superpowers, and YOU do not either.

Instead, she remained hungry to fail & learn from mistakes. If that meant going around to middle-age women and telling them stories about big red boobs all over the small Sicilian town, then so be it.

The goal is not to avoid embarrassment; the goal is to learn effective communication.

What we can learn from Andrea:

1) You DO NOT need a superpower to learn a new language

2) Those who reach fluency quickly are the ones who fail the fastest

3) The best way to approach our mistakes is to laugh at them & learn from them

When you transition from a closed to an open perspective on this, you are unlocking the restraints, and allowing the real learning to begin. Now that we’re thinking the right way about learning through failure, let’s go over the top qualities of fast language learners, like Andrea.

1) A childlike hunger to learn and a never-ending curiosity: the thing that makes kids such a joy to be around is their natural and contagious curiosity to learn and experience new things; “What’s that mama… Why… What is it… Can I use it for this… And for that too?!” Kids are full of questions and curiosities about why things are the way they are and how they work. On the flipside, as adults, it’s VERY easy to stop learning new things or to lose the excitement around new experiences and learnings. Well today, that changes. Today, you can commit to approaching a new language just like a child would: asking questions always, immersing yourself in every new experience possible, and learning around the clock (24 hours, 7 days a week; not just 2 or 3 hours a week). And trust me on one thing… As a learner who asks questions endlessly, I assure you that you will never annoy someone by asking too many questions – you will actually receive more appreciation than you think.

2) Learning by experience, not by textbook: you may be thinking, “Sami, that’s crazy, no one can spend 24 hours, 7 days a week learning a language.” My answer to that is, of course I don’t expect you to sit down for 24 hours a day learning language from a textbook and practicing it. What I am referring to is not a literal study habit, but rather a perspective shift on language learning. When you learn by textbook, it’s hard to do more than a few hours of study each week. Your brain will only retain a certain amount of information before it’s overloaded. When you learn by experience, however, EVERY hour can be a learning opportunity. Label your desk items at work with sticky notes, listen to German music and audiobooks when you’re completing a work assignment, watch/listen to German grammar or instructional videos daily, attend German meetup groups to practice your speaking. You get the point… Focus on experience-based learning opportunities and your brain will never be overloaded. In fact, the more you experience, the more your brain craves it. While textbook study drains your brain, experience-based learning energizes it. Great news, right? Not only is learning through experience more effective, but it’s also a lot more fun!

3) No shame in making mistakes: here, I’ll give you an awesome tip right now that will help you overcome your fear of making mistakes with advanced or native speakers; at the beginning of your conversation, tell them “Mein Deutsch ist nicht perfekt, aber ich will es verbessern. Kannst du bitte meine Fehler ausbessern?” This simply means, “My German is not perfect, but I’d love to improve it! Can you please correct my mistakes?” And that’s IT. You’ve made it clear from the very beginning that 1) You are bound to make mistakes and 2) You desire to correct them and are looking for your speaking partner’s guidance. It lifts the weight off your shoulders and creates a safe space for you to interrupt each other and learn from your mistakes.

3… Focusing on just these 3 qualities will push you further along your language journey than you could ever imagine. Have you ever wondered why children are so good at learning languages? Well, simply because they have these qualities. In fact, studies have proven that a hunger to learn, curiosity, experience-based learning, and lack of shame are the ONLY advantages children have over adults in language-learning. Shocking, right?! It’s not because they are talented or more able than adults. It’s simply because they are more eager, excited, and passionate about the process. The same studies have shown that, if they practice these qualities, adults are even better than children at learning languages. How is this possible? Simple. Adults have much greater brain power than children.

Hungry, curious, experience-driven, shameless + brain power = fluent speaker

Before you move on with your day, I have one small ask of you. Make a commitment to yourself – a commitment to be hungry, to remain curious, to prioritize experiences over textbooks, and to be shameless. You will learn as quickly as you allow yourself to. So why not step all the way on the gas pedal?

Cheers to your new language learning commitment! And remember, make a LOT of mistakes. Mixing up words like roofs and boobs is just a sign you’re learning quickly. How many mistakes can you make? Remember: the more you make, the better!

If you have any funny stories like Andrea’s, definitely share in the Comments below!

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